There's no such thing as smart.

There's no such thing as smart.

You either have a fixed mindset or growth mindset.

You're either a novice or an expert.

You might have been born with a big brain. Congratulations. But that doesn't mean you're naturally more intelligent than the kid next to you in the library studying eight hours a day when you only study for one.

As a father, this concept of who is smart and who isn't has become very important to me. How do we go about praising our children without hindering them?

How does this apply to the workplace and in our personal relationships?

After listening to the latest episode of the Art of Charm with Dr. Carl Dweck, I've realized that I tend to give a lot of surface level praise: "You're really smart. You have the talent. He's a genius, She's a genius. Everyone on my team is a genius!"

I feel foolish. Because a teams success has nothing to do with how smart you are, how talented you are, in the end, it all comes down to handwork. There's simply no substitute for for a junk yard dog mentality. 

What's even more interesting is that it took me 26 years on earth to have this honest conversation with myself about how I communicate with other people. Especially young children. Then again, I've always been told that I'm "great" at communicating. So it wasn't something I really thought I needed to work on until I become a father. What's even funnier is: The things I'm learning about communicating with children are just as applicable to adults. 

So how should we praise?

According to dr. Carol Dweck we should focus on praising the process. Praising the hard work that went into the accomplishment. The good strategy they used, their perseverance, their improvement. She says that doing this will put people into a growth mindset and equip them with the values that they need to be successful.

Allow me to paraphrase: If you want someone to be independent, you need to praise them for the traits they display that allow them to stand on their own two feet. Praise the process, not the result.

Makes sense to me.

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artwork: https://dribbble.com/shots/1629146-How-Love-Works

If only we could travel at the speed of light

It's pretty unbelievable, how good we've got it. Anywhere in the world, anytime, you or I can pick up the mobile device of our choice and stream this life changing performance from Neil deGrasse Tyson.

It should be required reading (watching) in the classroom. A swift and distinct separation of Church and State.

I wish this was around when I was a kid, I might have turned out to be an astrophysicist.

Watch the rest of the Cosmos Series free on Youtube here

I'm re-watching the series for the 2nd time. Please stop everything you are doing immediately and watch this series. Don't have time? Make the time. It's worth it. 

Talk about something that will give you a sense of gratitude for each day that stretches out before you...How about the infinite reaches of the unobservable universe? In a place so vast and seeming lacking of purpose, we have no other option than to create. 

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The Difference Between Interesting and Successful

     Interesting AND successful.....I don't claim to know much, in fact the only thing I know, is that I have a lot to learn. But one thing I've realized? Is that I refuse to sacrifice one in order to be the other. What does this mean? Well in reality, it means a lot of hard work. It means that any free time I have will be spent learning skills and gaining knowledge. The internet is a magical place filled with free information.

     In theory, the idea of improving yourself, for yourself, should be enough to motivate you. But it's not, and none of us truly accomplish anything completely on our own. Realize that everything you are doing to improve yourself on a daily basis is contributing to the great good of humanity. And on that note try and do something to improve yourself everyday! You can't fail. Reading a new book might change the way you view the world and in turn, what you choose to do with your life. And most importantly, realize that whatever it is you choose to do with you life, and your time, affects other people. Not making a choice, is still making a choice. 

     There is no such thing as a defining moment in your life. Everything we accomplish is the result of thousands of small victories and accomplishments. Every step you take in the right direction brings you one step closer to your goal, how ever small that step may be. All you need is the courage to take the first step. There is nothing stopping you except your own fear of failure. The best part about this is that no one cares about your failures, no one is keeping track of how many times you fail. This is a good thing because you will always fail more than you will succeed, get used to it, learn from it, and try not to keep failing the same way. Here are some websites that might help/inspire you: 

http://www.ted.com/ - Ideas Worth Spreading

http://mashable.com/ - Digital culture, Social Media, and Technology 

https://www.coursera.org/ - Take free online class from Standford, Princeton, Penn, or Michcigan

http://www.briansolis.com/ - Social Media knowledge

http://sethgodin.typepad.com/ - Go make something Happen

http://christianpf.com/how-to-make-money-with-a-blog/  - Start a blog that makes money

https://www.codecademy.com - learn to code for free